COSTA RICA

I went to costa rica for a medical conference and had a good time. The medical spanish conference was actually helpful. Tori, George and Jodee meet me and Dean there. While we were down there, we met some great new friends, Jason and Rachel. Yuri. And Pete from NYC.

Two days after we got back, i got sick as a dog.... ended up being strep and then tonsillitis with a nasty abscess. Ick. Been on antibiotics and it's much better. I don't think I'd ever been that sick before.

I'm learning more about myself and how I react and interact with people. I'm learning more about how people communicate. The older you get, you'd think it would get easier communicating, but it doesn't. Real communication requires vulnerability and people aren't always willing to be vulnerable in front of you.

Summer flying by

It's now August and I'm 34. I think after 30, the birthdays are not big deals anymore. Life you'd think would get simpler, but it actually becomes more complicated.

My job is OK, but not quite what I expected. I'm on call more than I like. I work more than I like. In the last 2 weeks I put in 96 hours. If it continues, i'm not sure how long I'll stay at this hospital. My life is not about my work. My life is more than that.

Friends have been coming to visit, which is so great. It seems that in the past, I've been the one doing all the traveling. I find that I make a lot of effort to maintain my friendships, but I'm finding that I'm tired of making the effort all the time. Friendship is a 2 way street. This weekend another friend came to visit. It's been lovely having her here. I appreciate her honesty and sense of humor.

Relationships with guys should be simple but it's not. I'm finding that friends and family have certain expectations about what type of guy I should be with. He should be this amazing nice guy that goes to church every week. His knowledge of the Bible should be extensive. He should know how to pray. He would love to volunteer. Etc. And I think I have those same expectations. Well what if the person I meet is not that person? He may be a Christian, but he may not go to church. He may be open to talking about God, but his knowledge of the Bible may be limited. Maybe he doesn't even know how to pray. What if he's a new Christian and knows nothing about what it means to be one? The fact that I've been a Christian for so long may not mean that I end up dating someone who is the same. I'm still processing through some stuff.

I've been going to this church in Kenosha that I really like. I'm hoping that in the fall, I'll get involve a bit more. Over all, I know my life is blessed. Good job, family, and friends. There are definitely bumps in the road, but how I handle it shows who I have trust in (God or myself). And through it I build my character.

visit with good friends

Two weeks ago, my friend Emily Bawden came to visit. It was so good to spend time with her. We went to the farmer's market. Celebrated her birthday at a japanese restaurant. It was just good to see an old friend again. I appreciate her friendship very much. It never really mattered what we do, we always laugh alot and have so much fun.

Last weekend, i was in NYC. Mel and Tori met me there. I thought I wouldn't like NYC. I was wrong! A lot of it has to do with the company i kept:-) Hanging out with 2 good friends from school-priceless. Went shopping, ate at nice restaurnts, etc.

I'm finding that I tend to keep a nice handful of good friends from all over the country. I can call them about anything and they would listen.

2 months

It's been 2 months since I've been here, and it's been interesting. I'm liking my job more, maybe because I'm getting used to the routine. Most people are nice but there will always be a handful of people that are mean and rude. I LOVE my job.

Today I met my friend Wendi, CRNA colleague and her hubby at this 7 mile flea market that has a farmer's market portion as well. I was not impressed with the farmers market :-) Oh, well it was fun trying. Otherwise, I've been a bum today, cause i'm on first call today and tomorrow. Haven't been called in yet, but just you wait... Wendy and Howard and others are meeting at this restaurant/bar tonight. There's a mechanical bull and live band. I'm hoping to go, but the hospital may be paging me....

Marla will be having her baby in less than 2 weeks and i'm excited to be an auntie. Can't wait to meet her. My weekends are filling up this summer so i hope i can go visit. I'm taking week off in July to take my parents on vacation to door county. Mom and dad are coming July 4th weekend. I'm flying to Myrtle Beach one of the weekends. Heather and little Adeline want to come visit too! Maybe August will be better :-)

What else am I thinking about? I'm wanting to look into different organizations I can volunteer for in this area. I want to give back. I don't want my life to be just about me. I'm praying for a great guy to come into my life. Someone who loves God and is committed to his faith. I wonder sometimes if I will ever fall in love? I meet these guys and something is missing...Am I really that picky? :-) I don't think I am....hmmm....

Life is good. Had some rough days. Had many great days. I have been truly blessed. Thank you, my God for keeping me rooted in you.

one month

It's been a month since I've been here and it seems still unreal that I live here. I'm adjusting to my new job. There's definitely things about it that I don't like, but there are things that I like. It's been interesting adjusting to working with different people. Very interesting.

I've been thinking a lot this week. Relationships take time and effort. Relationships with your family. Relationships with coworkers. Relationship with friends. We take our family for granted because we know that they'll love us no matter what we say or do. We don't make effort to be more patient with them. We get angry quickly. We take advantage of who they are. What does it matter that we make one another angry several times per week? several times per day?

Our attitude with our coworkers are the same. We only see our own view point. We look out for our own interests. Our team work mentality is always seem to be lacking. We talk about one another behind their backs. What does it matter anyway, we only work with them 8+ hours per day, right? It takes time and effort to bring people to work and think as a team. Sometimes it takes throwing our pride out the door in order to work together as a team. We are so task oriented sometimes, we don't see the whole picture.

Relationships with our friends. It takes effort from both sides in order to maintain a good friendship. There are friends that when you talk with them, it's all about them. Good healthy friendships that lasts a long time require both people to put time and effort into it. I think I'm one of those people that really invest in my friendships. I must admit though, I sometimes get tired of trying sometimes. I have friends from all walks of life, married, married with kids, single. It seems that I've always been the one that did more traveling to see them, did more calling, gave more of my time. Honestly, sometimes I get really tired of making all the effort. When there is little effort to return emails, phone calls, etc., I do get frustrated.

Relationships with family, co-workers, and friends take work. Not just on your part, but theirs.

My head is FULL! I've been just thinking direction of my life, goals, etc. I'll share more later.

getting settled in

I unpacked more boxes and trying to finish organizing my apartment. It's daunting to think that I probably moving again in one year-maybe closer to Milwaukee. Racine doesn't fit me. No nice restaurants, no nice parks, etc.

My job.... what can I say? I'm still adjusting.

I went to Racine Bible Church this past Sunday. It has a more traditional service. Mostly caucasians...decent teaching. From the comments the pastor made, it seems like a very ultra conservative church. I'll go visit a church in Oak Creek next. It's hard to find a good church to attend. I can make friends easily, but finding a sound Bible teaching church... much more difficult.

I'm praying for a good church. I'm praying for a mentor. I'm praying for a place I can help people. We'll see what God has for me.

I've been here for about 2 weeks now and it's been interesting. I got pulled to be on call after 2 days of working at the hospital. My family was here and I didn't really get to spend time with them. They understood, though.

It's definitely different from the hospital in Lafayette. I work harder here and more hours. They also pay me more here so it balances out. Already there have been changes taking place. We'll see how it goes this coming year. I may or may not stay. So far, i'm staying , but....

This past weekend I went to Annie and Dan's wedding in Rochester, MN. It was great seeing everyone again. I stayed with Emily and it was just nice to have low key evenings to sit, chat, and catch up. I do miss her. I was discussing with her just how odd it felt for me. Seeing everyone getting married and having babies. I couldn't help but feel "left out" so to speak. Someday.... I'd rather be single than marry any of the guys I've dated :-)

God is good. I'm blessed. I have a great job, a family that loves me, and great life-long friends.